I’m leaning towards no but want advice from people who will bother to read and care and tell me their honest opinion. thanks 
Met this girl when I was in college- we were roommates and always had a fun time together. While we always had a fun time, I did notice she was extremely bossy, found ways to blame others for the little things in life, and was generally all about herself. Because I was on her “good side” so to speak I never ran into this trouble personally- just some things I noticed about her personality.
Anyway, we live on opposite coasts now (I’ve visited her home, she’s visited mine since) and now she is getting married. I told her how wonderful that was/excited for her, etc. but I really didn’t know how I would afford the trip. At first she seemed totally nice/non bridezilla about it “you’ll just pay for the flight and dress, no problem” but NOW it’s a different story. She wants me to buy shoes, makeup and hair, special makeup to cover up a tattoo (that she knew about before she asked me to be in her wedding…) and just told me today I’ll have to take a bus from the plane to get closer to her house because she can’t come to get me. What was once- her words- a flight and a dress- has turned into something that will cost me $600+ when all’s said and done… and that’s without a gift.
Basically, she never calls me anymore to see how I’m doing or care about how my life is going, and only seems to care about her own wedding. I understand it’s her day, and if I lived in her state this would be a lot easier (more likely to suck it up and pay the little things for a friend) but since she seems to not care unless it benefits her… I’m having second thoughts. When I even mentioned that I couldn’t fly out twice – for her shower a month prior – she flipped out at me. Am I dealing with a crazy bride here or am I being unreasonable?
and we are both 23. young and searching for jobs. I COULD find the money for this but it would be difficult.
I wouldn’t he doesn’t sound like she is very genuine towardz you.
I wouldn’t.
As someone whose summer has been marred by two horrible wedding party experiences. What once was an honour is now submitting yourself to slavery.
I wouldn’t go to this womans wedding because it’s very clear that you’ve both moved on and in fairness she’s expecting alot from you considering that you’re not even living in the same state!
I can understand that she’s under alot of pressure and considering that you’re not even in the actual wedding I don’t see why you should feel you have to go. Just explain to her that while you appriciate her inviting you to her wedding you simply can’t afford to go becuase your circumstances have changed. If she can’t accept that well then that’s her problem not yours
I think you should back out. It sounds like it will be too much of a financial burden to you. Besides, she seems more interested in herself than anyone else. If she can’t even bother to call you once in a while to catch up, then she’s not a great friend in the first place. You don’t want to go through all the hassle of this wedding, only to have her ignore you after wards. Save yourself the trouble and tell her that it’s too much on you financially. If she can’t understand that, well…that’s her problem.
Total bridezilla.$ 600 to attend the wedding of a selfish woman who your not even that close to anymore! I wouldn’t waste my money. If she is demanding all of these costly details then she should pay for it.
Blame the economy
Say you have a job interview
say you’re starting a new job
say someone is ill in your family
say anything to get out of this wedding
don’t go!!!!
My honest opinion is, i wouldnt.
As a bride who has had MUCH trouble with her wedding party… I wish someone would have just been honest with me.
Either way in her eyes you will probably be a “bad guy” But all you can do is explain to her, that you simply do not have the money to be in her bridal party, but you would still love to be there to see her get married and help her celebrate her special day.
its not worth it to drop a grand to be in someones wedding- no matter how much you care about them.
Plus– this bride sound like she has “horrible-to-deal-with potential”
Best of luck with whatever you decide! But decide fast, so she will be able to replace you or what not.
Your right not to be in her wedding. She is giving you nothing but a hassle, and you are NOT even at the wedding and is expecting too much. NO WAY would I even consider being in her wedding she could be a lot more courteous and pick you up form the airport and have a place for you to stay and more, she is being unreasonable. Tell her thank you for the opportunity to be in her wedding but you have received several job interviews. I would NOT even send a gift with her attitude. You do not need her to treat you this way. There are better friends weddings to be in. I would go as far as to not be friends anymore, friends do not treat you this way.Best Wishes.
Did you already say yes? Or did you say yes and you’re thinking of backing out?
If you didn’t agree to do this, I highly recommend you decline. You and she are not close (you refer to her as “this girl”) and she had no business flipping out on you. And that’s just a few reasons to say no.
Did you already agree to be a bridesmaid and are thinking of resigning? I usually think people should honor their obligations and commitments. However, if she’s making your life a living hell and being consistently unreasonable, it’s best to resign ASAP. If you already agreed to be her bridesmaid, I would think you and she could reach a compromise: for example, you will cover up your tattoo, but she will pay for the make-up.
Definitely Bridezilla. You are absolutely not being unreasonable! She shouldn’t have gone back on her word. It may be her big day, but that doesn’t give her a free pass to treat everyone around her like garbage – especially the very people who will be providing support and helping her into her dress!
If I were you, I wouldn’t be in her wedding – especially if she’s going to act like that. IMO, if she wanted you to be in her wedding she should darn well have agreed to pay for your round-trip plane ticket, while she’s busy blowing money on her ceremony and reception – yet she can’t even come get you from the airport and expects you to take a BUS?
Yeah…I’d definitely not do it, if I were you. Take whatever money you’ve already saved and get yourself a new flatscreen or something!