Wedding rings
Attire/accessories (for bride, groom, bridesmaids, groomsmen)
Beauty (hair, nails, wax)
bouquet (bridal only..i want my bridesmaids carrying one flower)
wedding decorations
photographer
caterer
bar
dj
cake
centerpieces
limo
hotel room

now, dont get me wrong..i know there is so much more than that. but those are the big things.
i live near pittsburgh
and i made an estimate of about 150 people.
i do know the difference in wedding/reception. and i did include some of the stuff for the wedding. but seeing as i dont know exactly where i want the wedding (church, hall, hotel, ect) i didn’t include the stuff for that.

I really want to have some wedding pictures taken outside, but I’m debating on when to take them. The majority of the pictures (formals, etc) are going to be taken before the ceremony. I wanted to wait until after the ceremony to take the outdoor pics, but time constraints are making it look like that’s not possible.

If I do take the outdoor ones before the wedding, how could I keep my dress white and decent looking? I’m afraid that I’ll get it muddy or grass stained or something….

Any ideas on what to do?

At the moment, I’m trying to plan her wedding shower. The small and reasonable guest list has now jumped to over 40 people, very few of whom are actually close friend, and ten of whom aren’t even invited to the wedding!

Personally, I find it super tacky to a) throw over 40 people at me and expect me to finance this party, b) expect gifts from all the party members (even the ones not invited to the actual wedding), and c) invite ten people to a wedding shower -expecting gifts- while making it known that they are not getting a wedding invitation.

I tried to gently tell the bride that we should put a ”no gifts” notice on the invitations of those not coming to the wedding, but her mother got all huffy and insisted that this party was ”payback” for all the bridal showers, baby showers, etc. that the bride had ever gone to. She’d bought presents for those people, now it was their turn to buy presents for her.

While I don’t really want to argue with the bride, I find this beyond tacky and beyond rude. I also heard the bride say she wasn’t doing her wedding the ‘etiquette way’, she was doing it ‘her way’. I’m all for bending the rules, but…come on!

How would you feel if you were invited to the wedding shower of a woman you:
a) didn’t know that personally (say, you were on her softball team or were a distant coworker)?
and/or
b) didn’t receive a wedding invitation from?

Would you attend? If you attended, would you bring a gift? How would you feel about being expected to bring a gift as ‘payback’?

How should I handle this? I’ve made and addressed the 40 invitations as per the bride’s orders, but this isn’t sitting well with me. I don’t want this tacky party to be a reflection of ME.
There are no other bridesmaids. There’s me, and my 18 year old baby sister. She can hardly be expected to pay for anything – she is still in high school! My brother and his fiancee are in their mid-30′s, and still expected my parents to pay for their wedding (which is his second, I should add), host their showers, etc. The bride got a $12,000 inheritance from her grandmother specifically to pay for a wedding – please explain to me how one cannot fit in this budget?
This is the kind of control freak woman I can’t stand, and none of this behavior started to manifest until after she had a ring on her finger. Blehhhhhhhhhhhh.

Thanks!!

Oh, and the reception will be held outdoors, and we are in the South, so it is hot and humid. Plus, I have to consider that most people are rather conservative compared to where I am originally from.
It will be an afternoon/evening wedding with an evening reception. Only the reception is outdoors in her fathers backyard.
Sorry, I should add that it will be in her fathers yard, but he is a VERY important figure not only in my field, but in the city as well. This house is a mansion pretty much, so not just a simple garden reception, but an elaborate affair. Estimates at cost of wedding is at about $100,000 plus.
Sorry, I need to also mention that the girl and her future husband are both rather laid back and they have said the reception will contain mostly their favorite foods and nothing fancy, so I am torn between being more formal or less formal since I do not want to stick out as being overdressed or underdressed. And it did not say black tie.

Anyways, instead of having a debut at 18, I’m having it at 16 because I want to mix my two cultures together. I have a problem–I don’t want to be spending $10,000 for a party! I want to keep it low. Maybe around $3,000? -$5,000 don’t want to be a brat and make my parents spend loads of money for one night. I have a few questions:

1. Dresses: Instead of 9 girls, I’m going to do 6 girls and 6 boys. Where can I get semi-affordable dresses that are good quality? I’m NOT going to make them pay for their dresses. I actually saw an episode of “Say Yes to the Dress,” and the bride made her bridesmaids pay for their dresses. I believe that if I’m asking the girls to be part of my court, then I should be the one paying. Also, should I buy their shoes too, or should I just tell them to wear black pumps?

2. Boys in my court: Should I buy their outfits? I’m thinking I’m just going to write on their invitations that they should wear black button down and black pants. I’m going to send them identical ties that they should wear.

3. Invitations: Where can I get the nice paper? I went on papyrus, and it’s about $125 for them to print and ship twenty-five invitations! That’s INSANE. Especially because I’m inviting about 300 people. I decided that I’m going to make my invitations at home, but I need the nice invitation paper.

4. DJ. Do venues include the DJ?

5. Should I get a photographer? Yes or no?

6. Buffet? I think yes, because feeding 300 is going to be a TON if I go by plate

7. Dance classes! As stated above, there’s dancing involved. How many classes should I get? How much do you think it will cost? See, the problem is, the guys will definitely not want to be in my court if they have to go to multiple dance classes. I’m thinking about 4? The dance doesn’t have to be perfect–just presentable haha. Also, how can I modernize this? I’m thinking of doing a waltz and then switch over to some pop music—Wild Ones by Florida Ft. Sia? Any other song suggestions

8. Center pieces? Yes or No?

9. Any idea where to get a reasonably priced ball-gown?

10. Any color scheme ideas?

Thanks so much for your help!